Preferences

Preferences are markers that point to unconscious acceptable and unacceptable survival which are made up of beliefs and survival behaviors handed down from parents. We have little conscious language to express the reason why we prefer this or that preference. For example: “I prefer red cars. I prefer French food. I prefer books over movies.” We learned to use these acceptable behaviors to survive (feel normal) in our environment. What our caregivers deemed unacceptable behaviors, were punished and then repressed. Acceptable caretaker’s behaviors became our preferences. Our friends have acceptable behavior and our enemies have unacceptable behavior. The lists and combinations of preferences are infinite. The most direct way to understand other's hardwiring is to observe preferences & projections in everyday conversations:

Work
Working for a type of business or business environment

   Startup/old Corporation
   Private/public/government
   Work in office/home -
   cubical/private office

Home
   Doors fully opened closed
   Order/disorder
   Friends drop in/call first
   First/last one to go to bed
   Nightlight/no light

Politics
   Republican/democrat/
   independent/green
   Conservative/liberal/
   middle/extremist Right/left wing

Community
   Crowded/un-crowded places
   Personal Habits
   Knuckle cracking
   Gum chewing
   Eating/diet habits
   Etiquette

Space
   The need for quiet or noise
   Silence/ music in background/
   TV left on Sitting quietly/talking                                  
   Country/city
   Lake/stream
   A certain décor or environment        
Modern/antiques Hip/traditional       Simple/busy 

Style

Particular style of clothes Sloppy/neat    
Loose/tight    
Stylist/traditional    
Stiff/flowing
Light/dark
Plain/patter    
Colorful/muted

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© Scott Taylor 2016