Preferences are markers that point to unconscious acceptable and unacceptable survival which are made up of beliefs and survival behaviors handed down from parents. We have little conscious language to express the reason why we prefer this or that preference. For example: “I prefer red cars. I prefer French food. I prefer books over movies.” We learned to use these acceptable behaviors to survive (feel normal) in our environment. What our caregivers deemed unacceptable behaviors, were punished and then repressed. Acceptable caretaker’s behaviors became our preferences. Our friends have acceptable behavior and our enemies have unacceptable behavior. The lists and combinations of preferences are infinite. The most direct way to understand other's hardwiring is to observe preferences & projections in everyday conversations:
Work
Working for a type of business or business environment
Startup/old Corporation
Private/public/government
Work in office/home -
cubical/private office
Home
Doors fully opened closed
Order/disorder
Friends drop in/call first
First/last one to go to bed
Nightlight/no light
Politics
Republican/democrat/
independent/green
Conservative/liberal/
middle/extremist Right/left wing
Community
Crowded/un-crowded places
Personal Habits
Knuckle cracking
Gum chewing
Eating/diet habits
Etiquette
Space
The need for quiet or noise
Silence/ music in background/
TV left on Sitting quietly/talking
Country/city
Lake/stream
A certain décor or environment Modern/antiques Hip/traditional Simple/busy
Style
Particular style of clothes Sloppy/neat
Loose/tight
Stylist/traditional
Stiff/flowing
Light/dark
Plain/patter
Colorful/muted
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